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97whitevert
10-03-2003, 05:09 PM
Wonderful Time-Saving Household Tips...

Dirt: Layers of dirty film on windows and screens provide a helpful filter against harmful and damaging UV rays from the sun. Call it an SPF factor of 5 and leave it alone.


Cobwebs: Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduce the glare from the bulb, thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If your husband points out that the light fixtures need dusting, simply look confused and exclaim, "What?--And spoil the mood?"


Pet Hair: Explain the mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways by claiming you are collecting it for stuffing hand-sewn play animals for underprivileged children.

Guests: If unexpected company is coming, pile everything unsightly into one room and close the door. As you show your guests through your tidy home, rattle the door knob vigorously, fake a growl, and say, "I'd love you to see our den, but Fluffy hates new guests and the shots are SO expensive."


Painting: Don't bother repainting. Simply scribble lightly over a dirty wall with an assortment of crayons, and try to muster a glint of tears as you say, "Junior did this the week before that unspeakable accident...I haven't had the heart to clean it..."


Impression of Hard Work: Develop an exhausted look, throw yourself onto the couch, and sigh: "I clean and I clean and I still don't get anywhere..."


Barricades: Put a crime scene tape in front of doors where rooms are unbearably messy. .


"A clean house is the sign of a broken computer"!!!

winddysvt
10-22-2003, 02:51 PM
well said and
'nuf said......

awesome !!


:bounce: :thumbsup: